Bath Life Awards 2022

Arabella Tresilian, accredited mediator and founder of The School of Dialogue, shares how mediation won a Bath Life Award

People Services Winner

The School of Dialogue, founded by Arabella, is a Bath-based accredited mediator, resolving organisational disputes and interpersonal conflicts, and training teams in advanced communication, with a focus on mental well-being.

What was it like to win an Award?

It felt completely overwhelming – and also utterly delightful as there was such an atmosphere of celebration in the room! It took days for it to sink in.

Why do you think you won?

The scale of our work in 2021. Zoom meant that we could train in-house teams in mental health first aid and conflict management skills, at pace – I would sometimes be delivering three bespoke training courses per day. We also discovered that mediation cases can be handled very effectively (if not more effectively!) on Zoom, allow us to resolve over 30 complex disputes.

Tell us – what’s it like, being a mediator?

I am a naturally conflict-avoidant person – and I think most people are, even those who present as apparently abrasive or aggressive. So, as a mediator, it is a real privilege to walk side-by-side next to  people as they go to the heart of their problem, and work it out effectively through dialogue.

What do you love about it?

I remain in awe of how courageous and creative we humans can be in overcoming discord. I absolutely love how, through good dialogue, our mental health can be dramatically improved.

When did you first know mediation was the dream job?

The moment I knew conflict resolution was the right path for me was at the end of one of my first co-mediations, when the two parties – who had been in bitter, distressing dispute for two years – signed the agreement they had come to in the space of three hours, and got up and hugged each other. We all had tears in our eyes, and I just thought to myself, ‘My goodness, the mediation process is just magical.’

What’s something you wish more people understood about the School of Dialogue?

Not many people really know what ‘mediation’ actually is. Some confuse it with ‘artibration’, others with ‘counsellling’, and yet more with ‘giving up the fight’. In reality, mediation is a facilitated, confidential negotiation, in a apsychologically safe space, that gives you a lot more control over your future than litigation, or raises grievances, or walking away from the problem.  

What’s the best piece of business advice you’ve ever been given?

‘It’s got to be fun.’ That was the motto of my beloved late mother, Fay – who was a Bath Chronicle photographer for many years. The motto has stood me and my siblings in good stead. 

What are you working on at the moment?

I’ve been working with Scope to help tell government about the experiences of disabled people applying for benefits. Fighting to access disability benefits and services, both as a carer and service user, for over two decades left me with a passionate vision of a public sector system that would work well and fairly for all disabled people.

Have your own experiences impacted your work?

It’s why I do the work that I do as a dispute mediator in the health and social care sector, focusing on mental health and autism. As a campaigner for Scope, I have had the privilege of sharing my lived experiences to help call for disability benefits #withoutthefight.

Amazing! What campaigns have you worked on with Scope?

This year we helped deliver a petition of 30,000 signatures to the Secretary of State for Department for Workk and Pensions (DWP_, calling for a review of Personal Independence Payments assessment practices.

Let’s end on a fun fact. Tell us something surprising…

At the end of the first lockdown in 2020, my partner and I were driving into Bath for our very first ‘Eat Out to Help Out’ meal – the sun was shining, and everything felt new and astonishing. My partner said to me, ‘ If we won the lottery right now what would you do?’ I said, ‘ I’d buy a huge building and rn mental health and conflict resolutio nworkshops there, and i’d call it…the School of Dialogue.’ And that is how the concept was invented.

Amazing origin story! Did it change much from that first idea?

I quickly realised I didn’t need the huge building. We had Zoom and all the wonderful people of Bath and beyond – what more did we need? My partner, a graphic designer, designed the logo, and we were off…

www.mediaclash.co.uk / schoolofdialogue.co.uk / arabellatresilian.com